I wonder how many of the other 50 or 60 million households I heard were investing in the stock market found themselves in similar straits. Judging by what’s happened in the last week, maybe we were lucky to get out when we did.

On my right, the Comedy News Network (CNN) has five or six investment analysts in a laugh-a-lot hen-house talk-over about today’s plunging stock market. They’re wondering if CNN influenced the big boys by saying that Thursday’s fantastic $50 comeback in the Dow might have made investors think Alan Greenspeak doesn’t need to drop interest rates next week. Today, the heavy hitters might be selling so Greenspeak will be sure to get the message. Isn’t that the height of egotism or megalomania?

After dampening our Christmas spirit with almost two months of trivia from Florida, these same insightful analysts are wondering what happened to consumer confidence. Sales are down all over. Relatives didn’t buy many G.I. Joe, sink a fishing boat, or knock down a ski-lift games of mass destruction toys, programs and videos.

Instead, and to amuse ourselves, the wife and I re-wrote the lyrics to “The Twelve Days of Christmas” and passed it out amongst the family. Maybe, you’d like a copy of the last stanza. You can work it back from there:

How long do you think it will take the American people to realize that the Oligarchy merely gave us the choice of two equally pliable pawns and nothing’s going to change much? It doesn’t matter which of their cults is in power. You may, however, get a slight tax break just about the time gas prices go up to three dollars a gallon this summer. Maybe. Which can you count on?